Embracing Exhaustion: A Journey Through Chronic Illness

Understanding Chronic Fatigue

Exhaustion is a way of life for me, but learning to accept that has not been easy. Before I got sick, you couldn’t keep me in one place for long. I was a full-time single mom, working 50 or more hours a week while attending school full-time. I juggled house projects and planned future ones. I even worked out in the early mornings to kickstart my day, all while maintaining a social life. Then came the hospital stay in January 2022—27 days in the hospital that changed my life forever.

The Reality of Autoimmune Illnesses

Before my diagnosis, I had no clue that autoimmune diseases existed. I truly didn’t understand the meaning of chronic illness. The worst part is that most people can’t see our illness, which often leaves us feeling like we need to explain ourselves to everyone. But guess what? We don’t! It hasn’t been long since my diagnosis, but learning that I don’t need to justify why I can’t go out or why I need naps during the day has been a hard lesson.

Chronic fatigue is real, and we shouldn’t feel guilty about it. I know, I know—much easier said than done!

Struggles During the Holidays

Just this week, I was mad at my body for being so tired. My son and his fiancé visited me for Christmas, and we had a blast! But I was exhausted. I had to take naps and stop to rest, yet I still couldn’t shake the fatigue. Yesterday, I ended up with an ocular migraine from pushing myself too hard to “stay face” and not let my son see how worn out I really was.

For Christmas, my partner and I flew to his hometown to visit family and friends. My biggest fear was disappointing him or his family. I knew my chronic fatigue would play a key role in this trip, and it didn’t disappoint. “What was it?” I asked myself repeatedly over the last several days. How could I get a full night’s sleep and still wake up feeling like I needed to go back to sleep? How embarrassing is it that I can’t make it through a full day without needing to “rest my eyes” like an older person? LOL!

Accepting My Current State

What I had to do was accept my current state and enjoy the memories we were making. Forgiving our bodies for not cooperating the way we wish they would is one of the hardest things I have had to do, and I still struggle with it daily.

Finding Support in Our Community

I hope you all were able to navigate the holidays while treating yourselves with softness and forgiveness. It’s essential to connect with others who understand what we’re going through. Sharing our experiences can be incredibly healing.

If you have a story to share, please reach out! I would love to hear from you. Remember, we are not alone in this journey. Together, we can support one another and find motivation to live our best lives despite our health challenges.

Let’s continue to build a safe and supportive community where we can connect, share, and uplift each other. After all, we deserve to fly high, even when our bodies feel heavy.

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